I’m cold in here…

Just another day in the life of the average university student… who’s searching for someone like her…

If you go down to the wood yesterday…

Just another day in the life of an average university student… on the hunt for a partner in crime…

Take a week away from home at home… summer!

Just another week in the life of an average university student…

Give ’em what they want…

Just the (sexually charged) rambles of an average university student… with a kink

This is Summer..?

Just another few days in the life of an average university student… who is on the hunt…

Meet the sun…

Just another weekend in the life of an average university student… who met the sun…

If you believe it, believe it…

So after spending last night, wanting to bang my head against the wall, because of my mentally straining creativity essay – you’d think an essay about creativity might be… oh I don’t know creative in some way or at least mildly interesting, well you’d be wrong – I spent the majority of today finishing that off and also shopping, or rather window shopping through my computer, since I wasn’t intending on buying anything today, I was just getting stuff set up for when I do want to go ahead and buy.

I’m not too sure if I’ve said anything about this – but I’m guessing I have. I’ve decided to try my hand at magic and I’m not talking rabbit out a hat sort of magic here, I’m talking circle magic. One of the series I’ve been reading has circle magic as a major factor in the story and I’ve always had an interest in that sort of thing, so I decided that this summer I’m going to try casting my own circle. Since I’m not ready to declare myself a Wiccan or anything, I’m sort of making it up as I go along and not sticking to an ‘traditional’ method, or maybe a better way of saying that is, I’m not just sticking to one method or idea. I’m hoping that doesn’t mean something terrible will happen, because I do have a health respect for the forces of nature and magic, since I do believe in magic, although maybe not the kind other people believe in or maybe they do and I don’t know about it.

But any ways I’ve been shopping for the things I’ll need to cast my circle and what not, since I wanted to get a stone or crystal to represent all 5 elements: Water, Air, Fire Earth and Akasha – or as it maybe more commonly known spirit. In the end I decided on Lapis Lazuli – for water. Citrine – for air. Sun stone – for fire, I know that one seems a little on the nose, but I think the stone looks right somehow. Malachite – for earth. And Amethyst – for Akasha/spirit. I also wanted to find some nice candles, because I wanted to get some tall ones, not tea lights or anything like that, in the end I did find one for each element, although I’m still not so sure about the blue one. I don’t know whether to go dark or light blue, I chose one that was midnight blue, or at least that’s what the description says, but the picture makes it look quite a lot more on the side of sky blue, although that might just be the picture, I suppose I’ll see when it arrives. I also looked for a cup, but unfortunately I couldn’t find out I liked, that didn’t have specific marking on it, like the star or symbols like that and I want one without anything like that, so I’m thinking I might just use a wine glass or something like that. Although I did find this really lovely incense burner, but I couldn’t find any candle holders, because I want to cast outside, I thought candle holders would be a good idea, since I won’t have anyone other than me there, but we do have some at home, so I might be able to find some there. And I did manage to find all the herbs and what not that I wanted, which is great, I thought some of them would be really hard to find, but they were quite readily available – I also decided to start wearing nail polish in the 5 element colours, not tradition or anything, but I need to get a yellow and then I can start doing it.

So yeah. I had a once again somewhat dull – and brain numbing – day, but a productive one as well. I thinking productive is the watch word for the next 2 weeks, when my exams will be over – yay, I can’t wait – and I’ll be off home for the summer. Some of the people living around me have already left – and I thought I was leaving early, they’re leaving super early. I know that at least one of my house mates will be here after I have gone, because she’s going to the University’s summer ball, which apparently is more along the lines of a fun fair, than a ball. I was thinking about leaving them a note to let them all know I’m gone, since one of my house mates has been staying with his girlfriend a lot, so he might not be around when I leave, also with the whole cleaning the house thing, I don’t want them to think I’m not doing my share. I think I’m going to take the bins out and maybe wipe down the surfaces before I go, I know it’s not much, but at least I’m trying to do something, although thinking about it they’ll probably get dirty again after I’m gone, so it might not be worth it – I’ll see when the day comes around.

Quote/saying of the day: The moment you doubt whether you can fly, you cease for ever to be able to do it. – J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan

Packed, stacked and deleted… with a little aggression needed

So either I’m worse at maths than I thought – and I already admit I’m not good at it – or something else has happened.

I was doing my accounting, as one does on a Saturday afternoon and I realise that I have more money in my account than I can account for, so of course I’m a little worried and happy at the same time, because it could have just been a mis-transaction and the money could disappear, but also it could be that I spent less money than I thought this semester or I got more money than I thought this semester, but I’m hoping it’s one of the latter options, because of course not being as broke as I thought I was is a lovely surprise, plus I didn’t find out until now that my brother sent me £100 for my birthday, which I feel a little bad about now, because I didn’t say thank you, but I’ll just thank him tomorrow, as he’s coming to pick me up – yay I don’t have to try and fit all my washing in my tiny suitcase!

I’m a little annoyed at my favourite – right now – e-juice suppliers, because it would seem that they have stolen my money, as I got some juice from them on Monday and it should have arrived by yesterday, as they state that they ship within one working day and send it via first class postage, but it states that it is still pending, so I sent them a less angry than I actually am note, asking about what the hell is going on, hopefully they’ll get it sorted out, but unless they let me change the shipping address it won’t arrive until after I have left and I won’t get it until after the Easter break, as I won’t be here and all that jazz, but I’m hoping they will let me, since what happened wasn’t my fault and if they ad done it the way they said it would have arrived when I was here.

This isn’t the e-juice I was talking about BTW. But never know this product could be good.

So yeah, as well as sending angry, but still trying to be polite notes. I also somehow ended up clearing out my email, because I 900+ emails, that I either had never read and never would or just didn’t need any more and were just taking up space, now it’s more or less nice and neat. But going through old emails brought up some old memories, from high school and the many blow out ‘wars’ that my friends had I was somewhat too out of it to understand completely. Honestly those years are kind of foggy in my memory banks.

So yeah all that and packing, I’ve been having one hell of a crazy day – if you didn’t catch it that was sarcasm. But I’m just happy I’m going back home for the break, right now to care about much else. Looking forward to seeing my cats again and all or at least most of my friends from back home. Sure I like my new friends, but I want to keep close with my old ones, because we’ve been through a lot together – sort of – and well I think we have a potentially long lasting friendship, like the ones that you’re meant to build in university – I hope the friends I make here are for life, that could be nice, but who know what the future holds, for the likes of me?

Quote/saying of the day: A busy day is a happy day – Unknown

The chapter begins

So I made it to University – yay go me!

It’s been different… to say the least. I mean I’ve settled into my room alright, but I’ve yet to really make friends with my house mates, apart from the one down stairs who seems either shy or just doesn’t like me for some reason, they all seem like really nice people. The other girl living with me, already seems to have friends in the student village, so I think she knew them before or something.

So the first night I come back and the house is empty, dark and completely silent. So I’m sitting in my room reading, because I don’t have anything else to do and then I hear people outside and I think I’m never going to get to know people unless I put myself out there, so I do and I meet these two girls on the way back from talking to this taxi guy and they invite me to go around to their house, so I’m like yay some people to hang out with. So I go to their house, which is basically next door to mine and they handing me drinks, so I get pretty drunk and I’m very chatty when I’m drunk, which I think is a good thing.

So they’re all going to the Old fire station, for the first night party that’s going on there. So I decide to go with them, well they asked if I wanted to come and being drunk off my face I was all up for it.

So we all – well most of us – headed for the Old fire station in taxis. And once we got in people were buying drinks for me and we were all dancing together and I got a friend request from one girl in the group. So it was really fun and I had a good time. Although the next day I regretted drinking so much. I spent most of yesterday morning throwing up and sleeping, so yeah that was fun. But then I was hanging out with them again last night and most people had tickets to BIC, so everyone was asking everyone else, where they were going and most people were replying BIC, although some people weren’t coming out at all – again. But due to the night before and the morning after, I didn’t really drink very much especial because I had to get up for 9 this morning to do to my enrolment thing.

So instead to taking taxis this time we all piled into into the local bus and it seemed like most of the student village was going with us, so being at the back I didn’t think I was going to get a seat, but I did, although if I had been drinking as heavily as some people I probably wouldn’t have minded very much. But I was pretty much sober by this point. So we got there somehow without getting off at the wrong stop. And as it turned out one of the girls – a really nice Spanish girl – had forgotten her ticket and so she had to pay to get in for something she had already paid for, which she was of course upset about. But we all got in and it was a huge place. There were three parties going on that night, but I think this one was meant to be the main one. For freshers.

At some point during the night me and a couple other girls, went off to look for a cash point. I really just went to get away from with guy who was grinding on me and it was alright at first, but then I wasn’t really into it after a little while. So I just wanted to get away from him. So I went with them and we ended up going right into the city to find a cash machine, because the closer ones didn’t work. So we went for a nice long walk around. And the two girls I was with were really quite drunk and they both began to need the toilet on the way back, so they went in this private parking lot, while I just stood around, not wanted to leave them because they would probably not be able to make it back, so I waited for them. But it was a fun night. Every time we headed out onto the dance floor we would make this circle and then we got loads of people doing different dances in the circle, usual one or two at the time, but because I was so sober at this point I managed to keep myself out of the middle, somehow. But if I had been drinking I think I wouldn’t have, but it was all good fun and I sort of met some new people. I mean I met some new people while we were all standing around outside before we headed off. Although we moved these benches so we could sit on them, because the railing people were sitting on wasn’t at all comfortable, so yeah I while sitting there I somehow got the nickname Chester, don’t know how that happened. So this guy called me it on the bus, so I said I was going to call him Bilbo all night, but then he said he was a Hobbit fan, so that didn’t quite work out to plan.

But so far, I think I’ve had a mixture of good and bad times, overall. I mean hanging out in the house by myself was a little boring and super dull and the morning after with the throwing up is something to be avoided, but other than those two small events I think it’s been alright.

So today I had my enrolment, so I went over to my buddies house to pick him up, so we could go together, so I’ve now met my buddy and he’s allergic to grass, which I think is just a little weird, but apparently his father is allergic to trees or something like that, so yeah interesting family. He also stated that he’s not much of a party person, which is a sham, because I sort of am. Tonight there’s meant to be another party and we’re meant to wear these t-shirts to represent where we’re living, so the student village is black and white, which suits me just fine and other places are other colours. But until later, when I’m guessing people will probably start conjugating around house 50 again, since they have the last two nights, which is great for me, because I just wander over and they give me drink, although I did bring half a bottle of vodka and some strawberry and cream stuff, which is bright pink, so I might drink that tonight, maybe before I go over there, as that way I’ll be more outgoing and what not and more drunk, so I won’t have to pay to drink as much, because I haven’t got my student finance money yet, although I was suppose to get it today, hopefully tomorrow and I’ve only got a little bit left in the bank, but I went food shopping – sort of – with my buddy today, so I think I’ll be alright.

Quote/saying of the day: Smile; it makes people wonder what you’re thinking. -Unknown

To jump from a plane without knowing if I have a parachute on…

So today was results day. That nerve racking day that a large number of people, including nearly everyone I know, wish would never arrive and then it does and it’s all over or rather all beginning.

I was meant to wake up early and head into the city to get my results and that’s not what I did, I woke up early looked at the clock, turned over and went back to sleep, allowing myself to momentarily forget it was results day, but not for long, but for long enough for me to miss my bus. So I went online and spent a few annoying minutes battling with my own mind to remember my login details, before confusing myself over where to look for my results and when finally I found them, I just stared. I could hardly believe it, I check and I didn’t get the grades to get into my chosen universities, so I cried a little and then went on facebook to congratulate my friends on their personal achievements, the A’s and B’s slapping me in the face and making me wish the ground would just swallow me whole.ll

Then the father came in, asking about what my results were and if I wanted a lift in. It was horrible having to tell him I hadn’t got the grades, so he did what he does, question me – or rather interrogate me on what I was going to do now, go through clearing, do a third year. I didn’t want to even think about doing a third year, so clearing it was.

So just for something to do and to keep myself from bursting into tears, I logged into my email and what was sitting there an email from UCAS and under that an email from Bournemouth university, both congratulating me on getting into BU. It was like… jumping out of a plane and thinking you didn’t have a parachute, but finding out you actually did just in time, to open it and not come smashing down to earth.

So after taking a moment or a hundred to let in sink in. I thought yay, now I can relax a little, not so, today was a slightly hectic bustle of student accounts and applying for accommodation, which apparently I was meant to do weeks ago – oh dear – but I still got a room in a small house, with a think 3 other people. You had to fill out with little profile, which the other residents would be able to see, age name and they asked for a short statement, which I declined to give – although I wasn’t the only one. So I’ll be spending the next year living with a 18 year old girl who apparently likes to socialize, a 30 year old guy, who I know nothing else about and a mysterious person, because they wouldn’t let me see the profile on them, but that doesn’t really matter, as long as they are nice and all that jazz. I thought it was best to go for a smaller house, less people to the number to showers and other facilities and also the other smaller places only had one person confirmed and I thought it best to know a little about the people I’ll be living with and all that jazz, than live with complete mysteries – although one of them will be, for some unknown reason. I also signed up for the buddy program they have, so apparently I’ll be getting a buddy and they have a pizza, bring your buddy night, were you get free pizza, now I’m always up for free stuff, so I’m hoping my buddy is nice, so we can go to that and get free food – yay freeness!

So after everything was sorted, me and the father headed into town, because we had some errands to run and since we were already in the city, we ate out and went to see Guardians of the Galaxy, which I can honestly say I like. – This may contain spoilers! – The plant at the end was cute, although that bit didn’t really surprise me. But I’m wondering if they really will continue to make more films, since I think this one went down well, so I don’t see why not.

So along with a little accounting and some payments that need to be made, tomorrow will be filled with packing and working out and things to that nature, since I’m heading down to Cornwall this weekend and I’ve sort of let myself go to seed, so to speak. I know one day won’t make the biggest of differences, although one day of only eating 2 meals and no snacking, can drop my weight by about 2 stone, but still, one day of healthiness won’t change that much, but I’m still going to try,since I’m hoping for sunshine so I can get my bikini out, before the summer ends – and the work begins. And even if it does rain I might be that one insane girl that wanders around in short shorts and a bikini top like she isn’t shivering in the cold wind and doesn’t have goosebumps all over her arms and can still feel her toes and fingers – although that does be a slightly desperate and almost completely insane move, but what can I say, I’m a little insane, as my therapists will one day most likely tell me, in her over polite way, with her big eyes staring at me, in that slightly creepy ‘I never blink’, way that they do.

And when I get back in 6 days or so, the brother is coming back, but before that the Grandparents have come over – from Jamaica – to see all their lovely grandchildren and children and all that jazz. So yeah the house will be bustling and I’ll be trying to pack for University and sort out all the things I’ll be needing – pots and pans and mugs and cup and all that domestic jazz. Oh the joy.

Quotes/sayings of the day: All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another. ~Anatole France

Those who expect moments of change to be comfortable and free of conflict have not learned their history. ~Joan Wallach Scott

When you jump for joy, beware that no one moves the ground from beneath your feet. ~Stanislaw Lec

Alright so today I put a triad of sayings/quotes of the day, because I couldn’t choose one that I liked the most, so look over all three and perhaps they will make you wiser…

So I’ve liked Gabrielle Aplin since I first heard her song, ‘Please don’t say you love me’ and this song is lovely – in it’s our right – so there it is.