And so she became a heart breaker…

So apparently I’ve become something of a heart breaker.

Weird I never really thought this would happened, maybe because the sort of guys I used to date didn’t really put their hearts into it, so I couldn’t break them, but then that was how I liked it, since I didn’t put my heart into it either, not really.

So one of my friends from ‘back home’ – meaning not a new university friend – came down over the weekend, well she came down on Saturday and left on Sunday, so she only came for an evening and a morning really, but like a one night stand. It was nice to see her again, as it felt like ages since we had talking, since quite a lot has happened to me since we last properly spoke, with the big move and meeting Mr G and all that jazz. But honestly it hasn’t been that long, although I wish she could have stayed longer, but I might go home for reading week and we’ll see each other over the Christmas break and she said she was going to drag me – kicking and screaming if she has to – to Christmas parties with her and her boyfriends friend group, which is the one with the first in it – I think I gave him a name didn’t I…? Oh well he’s back to being the first again. Speaking of him, he’s one of the reasons why I have been called a heart breaker and – in jest – a home wrecker, but I think she was thinking heart breaker when she said that, because to start with he wasn’t involved in any way, when we got together.

Any ways got a little side tracked here, so we were doing what girls do when they get together after a long time of not seeing each other and have bought themselves quite a bit of alcohol – which we didn’t finish, so I still have some of it – we had a good and surprisingly long girl talk, which basically covered my new exploits, earning me the name sex monkey for a short amount of time and her relationship, which is going really well, although she obviously worried about next year, when she goes off to university and he… actually I’m not too sure what his plans are, but it seems that they are making plans to be with each other and I know she wants to stay with him. And then the subject of the first came up and apparently I did a number on him, now this coming from her could just be hyped up a little and since she was drunk, it probably wasn’t quite how she said it was, but basically, after our night together, he felt so ‘lonely’ that he got back together with his ex, just for someone to ‘be with’ and then promptly broke back up with her, now I feel sorry for her, because apparently she was really in love with him, but their relationship got really nasty near the end. And they go to the same university, although not the same course, since that could get really awkward. But that’s the reason she wants to drag me, potentially kicking and screaming to Christmas parties that he’ll be at. Don’t get me wrong I would like to see him again, but that could be really awkward, although I think I might just get a little drunk before hand and then everything will be fine, because I’ll be so happy and drunk that I honestly won’t care.

So any ways after girl talk and dinner, we headed outside to smoke her cigarettes, I feel bad because I’m always bumming smokes off of other people, as I don’t buy my own, for one I have no idea which brand I like, because I just take what I can get. I know I liked the roll up she used to get, but when you’re on a night out and drunk, you don’t really want to be fiddling with roll ups, unless I suppose I could pre-roll and bunch and then put them in a little containing like straights.

But any ways while we were outside, one of the people who are always outside drunk came over and started chatting to us. Now I kind of knew him, I mean we’d met and hung out before and everything and he’s always trying to get people into his house for pre-drinks for some reason. But any ways since by this point I was slightly – almost completely – plastered and with a light buzz from the cigarette, since I find they do that do me. I started to talk rather loudly about Mr G, referring to him as my F-buddy. I then went on to divulge that I couldn’t really completely remember what his name was. I’m not sure if he’s gone on to tell anyone else this, but if he has then my house mate will most diffidently hear about it and I’m not too sure if she’ll ask about it, like to confirm it or something.

I have an idea what his name is, but I’m not sure if it right and I’ve been to see him again. We sat and watched 300 – the newer one with the girl from the Casino Royal (Bond) in it – among other things.

I’m not sure how weird it would be if I asked him his name the next time I see him, which won’t be for another 5-7 days since mother nature has come to say hi again, which I’m super happy about, since I’m also I little irresponsible and thought that I was pregnant, but I’m on the pill now, so that will be the last scare – for a while at least. I’m not stupid just passionate I sweat and not a great role model for safe sex, I know all the things, I had the classes and all that jazz, it’s just yeah… Well no need to worry about that any more. Or maybe I will be seeing him sooner, some guys don’t mind, we’ll see. I mean it’s meant to be good for you, like it’s mean to help with the pains and make it shorter although because of the pill, this could potentially be my last one for a while, because that came be a side effect. I suppose I’m glade, but at the same time it has been nice to have that big red sign that I’m not pregnant and all that jazz.

Fortunately the red river didn’t turn up until Sunday, so I didn’t have to deal with it until then. Although it did make he consider leaving my friend, who got a little bit too drunk, throw up and then passed out in the bathroom, leaving me outside thinking she might choke to death on her own vomit and go see Mr G. I did get her into the bed in the end and left a tub by her head, in case she threw up in the night, but in the end I ended up passing out in the bed beside her and left Mr G hanging, but now I’m not too sure what he thinks our relationship is, I just us to be friends with benefits, but I’m not too sure if he wants something more, since he hints that he wants to hang out with him during the day or as my friend called it ‘date time’ and he seems to get really insecure, such as asking about if I’m with other people and stuff, which I haven’t been since we met, but it’s not like I won’t be in the future, because I don’t want to be his girlfriend.

I know that might seem a little weird, again the girl wants a friendly physical relationship and the guy wants romantic relationship, but hey ho the world ain’t like all those romantic films want us to think it is.

Or perhaps I just have a more male point of view on love and sex and all that jazz.

So this evening instead of doing work, which is what I should have been doing this evening, I have been searching the internet for flavoured cigarettes, I found a whole bunch of sites that sell them but they won’t ship to the UK, so I might ask my friend about getting her friend to send them to me, after looking into why they won’t ship to the UK, I know you can buy flavoured paper over here, but I’d rather buy straights and you can get this one brand, but it really expensive and I’d rather get this one called Kiss, which apparently is or was based in the UK, which makes me wonder why no one is sell it over here and all that jazz, maybe I’m just looking in the wrong places or something.

Quote/saying of the day: People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel – Maya Angelou

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I’m young so I can be wild, what’s your excuse?

So recently I got this app on my phone called whisper, it’s this thing where you post messages with picture backgrounds and the whole thing is anonymous, which if you’ve read some of my previous posts, you would know is something I like.

So any ways, I’ve been posting a couple things, secrets and questions and base thoughts and all that jazz. The app has this private message things, so you can message the person who posted a whisper and chat with them, the private message part does have a couple small bugs in it though, which is annoying. But any ways so my first post, I think I got like 10 replies in about 5 minuets or something ridiculous like that.

But Saturday night I was feeling a little down and out of it, as at least two of my house mates, had gone out, one to his sisters wedding for the weekend and the other just out with friends, I would have gone outside and looked who was out there, but they all sounded drunk and I wasn’t so I didn’t want to really hang out with them sober, so I whispered something about being alone and not wanting to be and this guy private messaged me. We got to talking and he invited me over to his place, at first I was really unsure as to whether or not I would go, but he seemed really nice and he wasn’t being all sleazy like most the guys I’ve so far chatted to on whisper and he was talking about how we could just be friends if I wanted to and just hang out, so he drove over and picked me up. Now at the time there were some people outside, I’m not sure who it was because I didn’t bother looking, as to the fact I kind of didn’t want to know, but I know it was a girl and a guy at least, as I could hear them talking from my room.

I’m sort of hoping that it wasn’t the guy that I kind of like and all that jazz. As I’m not too sure what they thought was going on.

Any ways, so we chatted for a bit and then headed back to his place, as it looked a little weird just sitting in the car and all that jazz. He lived right by the beach so you could see it from his window, although by the time we got to his place, it was around 2:30, so I couldn’t see anything, especially as I wasn’t wearing my glasses. So he made me a drink, rum and coke – me favourite at the moment, after from Garden of Eden, because that was delicious – and we sat on the sofa and chatted for a little while, before he asked me about whether or not I minded him smoking and I was kind surprised, but we had a nice little smoke together, before he asked the ‘big question’ about whether or not I found him attractive, at this point I had to make a snap decision and that lead to use making out on his sofa, which wasn’t super comfortable, it was this sort of green fake leather sofa. So we moved to the bedroom and …

It was fun and after he was really nice and all complimenting me and all that jazz, so that nice and then we just lay and chatted for a little while, before heading back into the other room for another drinks and a smoke, which sort of went to my head a little, as I could feel it going a bit… fuzzy and light with the cigarette, which was nice, so we chatted for a bit more, before he went to find out the time. Only to inform me it was 5 am, bed time or something like that, at least we went back to the bed.

So I had a couple more firsts that night/morning and only got about 2 hours sleep, before he woke me up for a good morning greeting woody style. But hey it was fun and the same with the first.

So after that I did sleep for an hour or to, until he got up and then I just couldn’t seem to go back to sleep, so I just sprawled out in his bed and lay here for an hour or something, listening to him go about his morning, until I couldn’t take it any more and got up. He gave me a lift back and said he’d like to see me again. And in the end I sent him my number later that day and he’s sent me a couple messages today, so at least he’s not one of those guys that feels he has to wait a certain amount of time before texting the girl, because I do have a time limit and then I just ignore them, unless I really like them that is.

I’m not too sure if anyone saw me doing the walk of shame or not that morning, since it wasn’t that early, so people could have been up and all that jazz. I don’t even know if my house mates knew I was gone, because she hasn’t said anything and the one downstairs doesn’t talk to me, so yeah he hasn’t said anything either, but she could just be respecting my privacy and all that jazz, which is nice of her.

So Sunday day was truly a day of rest, as I didn’t want to do anything all day, as I was achy, tired and ill, as I have somehow got fresher’s flu, even though I was trying to be careful and everything, but I suppose I probably got it from someone in my lectures, since there was always people coughing in that, disturbing everyone and now that’s me.

Although I got this free Menthol e-liquid, with the ones I ordered the other day and apparently Menthol is good for colds, although I’m not sure how true that is, but I don’t think it will hurt really. Although I may have given it to Mr G, but I did say I had fresher flu, before he came to pick me up, so he was duly warned, when we started that adventure.

Although he was telling me about the university, back when he went to it and I found it surprisingly interesting to see how it had changed.

So moving on I was so tired when I got up this morning, although I did go to bed at 10 last night, but I couldn’t sleep because my skin was reminiscing about the mornings activities. So I woke up still aching in a freezing room, as I had accidentally left my window open all night and it was poring it down outside and all I thought was ‘I really don’t want to get up right now’ but I had a 9 o’clock lecture, so I managed to drag myself out of bed at 7:15 and put on a whole bunch of layers and a coat, which I don’t really like very much, but I don’t have anything else really, because I still haven’t got my hoody back yet – I shouldn’t have given it to her in the first place and I keep meaning to send her a message or something, but by the time I get around to it, it’s late at night and I think that would be a little weird, so I keep waiting until the next day – it’s a bit of a circle – and since I don’t know where she lives I can’t go over and get it, or I would have done that by now. Although I did go and get my post from the next door neighbours.

So I’ve been thinking as one does now and then over the things I did with Mr G and I’m wondering whether or not I should go into town to get the morning after pill, because just like with the first – I feel like I should start calling him Mr first now – it was unprotected, which yeah I know is bad, but he did the whole pull out just before thing, but I was thinking better safe than sorry, right? So I was going to go in today, but then it was so miserable out and I was feeling so horrible, I just couldn’t. I could hardly drag myself to the first RAG meet and greet thing this afternoon, but I did go an found out more about the trips and the one to Machu Picchu seems pretty good, even if it is over £300 for the deposit to go, but I’m not sure when you have to pay the deposit by and all that jazz and fund-raising is hard, but it’s all for a good cause. I’ve also signed up for this food thing on Saturday, with some friends and since one of the societies that I’m part of, are trying to get together a team, I’ve said I’m interesting in being part of that team. The same friend that told me about this, also got me to agree to go to a Latin and salsa dance class tasted session, which actually seems good, but I’m not sure how much it’s going to be and if we’ll be given partners when we get there, or just partner up on our own or what not, since there might be more girls than boys and all that jazz, so have to see when it comes to it, but I’m completely bot against dancing with a girl as my partner.

Quote/saying of the day(s): I guess nothing puts a damper on a one-night stand as much as your friend pointing out all the opportunities where you might have been killed. – Mindy Kaling.

Spending Time…

So its been a little while since I last posted and quite a bit has happened since then, but honest I can’t really be bothered to go through all that so I’ll just do the highlights or something along those lines.

So I went to the fresher’s fair with my now good friend – yep I’ve made one of them at least – and met someone who lives in a uni-let like her. So by the time we headed to Dylan’s the uni bar/restaurant, our new favourite place to hang out and grab lunch, I had potentially – meaning I signed up for emails from – 8 different societies/clubs. There was; Disney, Whovian, Harry Potter, horse riding, RAG, archery and pole dancing. Though I’m not going to do horse riding, since it’s rather expensive and all that jazz and I missed the first Whovian one, because it was at the same time as Harry Potter, where I got sorted into Slitherine – yay, who didn’t see that coming?

The Disney society seemed fun and the first one we watched the lion king, a film I haven’t seen in a while, so that was nice. I also saw this guy with a Zelda hat, which I then wanted to steal, but didn’t – obviously.

So this week has been more academic, as we have actually been having lesson/lectures on more than just what the topic is about and all that jazz. Although it has meant getting up early for nine o’clock lectures three days, although I do get Tuesday off!

So last night my housemate, who has taken to calling me beautiful and darling instead of my name – still not sure how I feel about that – took me out drinking, meaning he paid for my drinks – always up for free drinks – at the karaoke night, at his workplace Dylan’s. It was nice hanging out, although slightly awkward at first, but I found out I think I like gin, as I got this cocktail called Garden of Eden,which has Gin in it, but it was a cocktail, so it may have been that I actually couldn’t taste the gin at all. I did see a couple people I new on the way out of the bar, including Mr nice guy and his house mate, who I’ve taken to calling Bilbo in my head, don’t think he would remember why, if I called him that to his face.

So as my new good friend had got 241 voucher for pizza express, we decided it would be a good idea to go there for dinner this evening, but first I had to get the bus, with my new bus pass. I almost didn’t get off at the right stop, but fortunately I did and then had to get another bus into town, I have to take 2 buses to get into the town centre, if I don’t want to have to pay and since I’ve got a bus pass I think it’s a waste of money in more ways than one. Yeah so any ways, before pizza, she showed me where Primark was – that being the most important shop on the high street. And although I didn’t intend to I bought some stuff. Then we went to the smallest pizza hut I have ever gone to, so that was interesting. They had this touch screen drink machine, which was a little weird and I didn’t realise you had to hold the button down, at first.

It was nice hanging out and I got to know a lot about her background and family situation, which was interesting, then we went back to her place to play cards against humanity, only to find out the cards weren’t there, so I scribbled on her white board and for some reason, cleaned her kitchen table, although the uni-let houses are a lot nicer than the student village houses, but then the uni-let houses are more like real/ordinary houses on an ordinary street.

So after running into Mr nice guy outside my house, I came home to find out that I have been sending my post to house 50, instead of my house – oops! But they were nice about it and sent me a message saying so, so I’m probably going to go over tomorrow afternoon and grab it, but I’m hoping everything turned up at once, because I ordered 3 things and they were all meant to arrive today, so at least one has obviously. But I know which one diffidently has because they sent me delivery confirmation.

Quote/saying of the day: It’s so hard to forget pain, but it’s even harder to remember sweetness. We have no scar to show for happiness. We learn so little from peace. – Chuck Palahniuk