The prep before the storm…

Just another day in the life of the average university student, who’s better late than never… Continue reading

Advertisements

What we served ourselves…

Just another day in the life of the average university student, with love, life and summer on the brain… Continue reading

A trivial shift in the time line…

So it’s 10 days until my birthday, alright I’m an adult. I mean legally I’ve been an adult for almost a year now and I can do everything in a large number of countries – you know smoke, drink, vote.

But I don’t feel like an adult, I still feel… well I don’t feel like a child either, sure next September, I’ll start paying proper bills and renting my own place, real adult like stuff, but isn’t there meant to be something that makes you feel adult like or something, I thought it would be a little different. But then again when I was a child and I mean a child, I never wanted to get to this point in my life, while my friends admired the adults and were wishing they could be all grown up, I was wishing I would never grow up, while my friends were chatting about the pros of being ‘an adult’ I was noticing all the cons, sure the pros are great and everything, but if I had the choice I’d spent the rest of my natural life reliving my childhood, well up until I hit the double digits that is.

I know that probably sounds all selfish, but I just don’t feel like I’m properly equipped the be adult like, I mean I pretty much know nothing, about living an adult life, sure I can probably imitate it, but inside I’m curled up in the corner, crying my eyes out and sometimes on the inside these days as well, I suppose I’m always going to be that way.

Any ways, I’m just getting all  twisted up because I’ve got a whole bunch of work piling up, my plans aren’t working out the way I wanted – the best laid plans, right? – and I’m going to be another year older soon – you would think I was turning 60 the way I’m acting about it.

So my friends coming down next weekend, or at least that’s the plan at the moment. She wants to celebrate our birthdays, since her’s was yesterday and all that jazz. I got her this book, which I think she’ll appreciate; shag yourself slim and a couple small things. I did tell myself that I wasn’t going to celebrate my birthday this year, but it’s quite a few days before and since it’s reading/project week after that, I can still have the slightly depressing birthday I planned – I know planning myself a pity party, if that’s not sad what is? But I haven’t had a proper happy birthday for a while now, I mean I’ve had happy moments and all that jazz, although there was one year, where I thought my family had forgotten, but fortunately for myself they hadn’t.

I’ve been debating on and off recently if I want to stop going for casual relationships and actually have a – more or less – committed one. But there’s a whole bunch of pros and cons to both sides, so I’m still on the fence, as I am with most things I life. But I have met some nice people.

I met a couple new people, at the screening of American Psycho, that the psychology society here had this Friday, there was only five of us there, but it was nice all the same and we had an interesting chat, while we waited for the other people to arrive – and they never did arrive. Honestly I don’t think there’re going to ever get that many people, because it’s on a Friday night, everyone’s going out. I’ve sort of suspended my ‘going out’ because I want it to remain fun and interesting and what not and not become a mundane activity, as basically everyone I’ve talking to about it says it has for them. I don’t want to become one of those people that works all week and then spends all their wages on drinking the weekend away, it’s such a circular life and one I don’t want, so I’m not starting it now. I mean some people seem to come to university and just go crazy, like they’ve never gone out drinking or to clubs in their life, I don’t want to become that either. I know I’ll probably never do anything amazing, earth shatteringly great with my life, but I’ve got to give myself the chance or something along those lines – does that sound conceited? Because that wasn’t what I was going for, I think.

A demotion over days…

In due fashion of my day off and because my bio text book has yet to arrive – I should probably find out when it’s going to get here I need it – I spent today doing a range of things, including but not limited to cleaning my room a little more.

I was going to have one big summer/spring clean before I left university, but since I had an inspection of sorts yesterday or was meant to have one – I don’t know if it actually happened – I decided it would be a good idea to do a slow clean sort of thing, basically just continuous cleaning. I mean I tidy up and what not and I clean, by clearing out rubbish and cleaning up spills or anything like that, but I mean really clean here. Today I did the floor a little, although I really need to get the hover in and hover it, but I think I will leave that to the last few days or so, because I’ll have to do it then and brushing has worked just fine for now, since it’s mainly hair and sometimes crumbs that get the floor dirty.

But other than cleaning, I’ve been looking into making money to fiance my summer master plan, or rather as I have demoted it, my summer plan, because I haven’t been feeling too great about the whole thing recently, but whatever. So I got this ticket thing out of a magazine, before Christmas I meant to look into over Christmas, but I forgot to take it home with me, so it’s just been sitting around and perhaps very fortunately for me, it’s still valid for quite a while longer, so I’m going to look into it over my Easter break, mainly because you have to post it in and I don’t have any post stuff here and I don’t really want to get any just to post one thing, you know?

It says that you can win a million, but I don’t think I’ll be quite that lucky, but that doesn’t matter even if I only win the lowest amount of money for that ticket, then I’ll still have more than enough money, so yay!

I know I’m leaving basically everything up to chance here, but hey ho I believe in the power of the universe, at least I think I do. It’s easy to believe in something when it’s yet to let you down or do something you don’t understand. But I believe!

Any ways let’s not go into all that potential mumbo jumbo… so it’s confirmed that my friend is going to come down the weekend before my birthday, but she invited me to do something next weekend and because I’m here I can’t. I mean I could get a train for the weekend, but £58 for just a weekend? Although I am thinking about going home for reading week, mainly because I want the father to pick me up for Easter, because I want to take stuff home and I can’t really do that if I take the train or something, also I don’t really have any money, so I can’t really afford to take the train or anything. I mean if I took the train down for reading week, that would mean that I wouldn’t have to pay for food that week, meaning that I could afford that, but I don’t have any money for food over the holidays, because I expected to go home and all that jazz, so I can’t really afford it, especially with having to pay the deposit on my flat and I did tell him that, but it seems he’s taken to ignore it. I’m just going to talk to him about it closer to the time or stay here and starve, because I don’t have money for food, one or the other.

Money money money. I want to get a job, but I thinking because I’ve got 3 weeks – including this week – until Easter, when I’ll be away and then only 4 after that until I’ll be back home for Summer, I don’t think it’s the best time to go looking for a job in Bournemouth, although I’ll start looking next year, when I’ll be here for more time. I’m not really sure where I want to work, I mean I don’t think I’ll be very good in a big store or anything and I don’t think I’ll be a good waitress, with my terrible memory – I forgot what year it was the other day and had to ask my friend and I’m constantly forgetting how to spell things, it’s actually quite odd.

quote/saying of the day: Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars.- Norman Vincent Peale

Eat the worm and cheer up the friends…

So I’m going back into counselling. Well I was sort of in counselling before, but honestly nothing came of it, but I’m giving it a second shot. Due to the bus times, I’ve got some time to kill in the morning, because as the father pointed out, it’s better to turn up early than late, because I’m not completely sure where I’m going, even though I google mapped it today, because the directions they sent me didn’t make sense to me, probably because I don’t really know the place every well and all that jazz.

After a bit of deliberating, I decided that shopping would be a good way to pass the time and since wandering around by oneself came be dull, I invited the friends, but I’m going to have to ditch them for a while to go to the session, although I think I’ll be the first one in and all that, due to the nocturnal nature of some of them. I usual go a little nocturnal during my holidays and sometimes even just on the weekends, but I’ve got to get up early tomorrow, so I’m hoping that saying about the ‘early bird’ is true.

A bunch of us are meant to be meeting, going shopping and then back to a friends place for Chinese and booze. Which will be interesting, because one of the girls that is coming gets a little off her head when she eats Chinese and she’s a light weight to boot, so yeah will be an interesting and we might see her rather annoying alter ego Candy, who is American.

So my Wednesday is pretty full, which is wonderful as far as I’m concerned, but other than that no other plans until the weekend, when we’re going out on the Saturday, with a friend I haven’t seen in a while and have dearly missed. So it’ll be wonderful to see him again, we were meant to be going away together, but he backed out, because his Grandfather was dying, but we’re having this night as a cheer up, although I think he’s handling it very well, better than I ever did, at least.

So afar taking a hardly more than a glance at myself in the mirror, I have decided that I’m getting too much of my ‘fat’ back and I’m going to start working out again, so I started out slow today, with just about an hour gentle exercise – yay the endorphin rush, that didn’t really last very long.

Quote/saying of the day: To burn with desire and keep quiet about it is the greatest punishment we can bring on ourselves. – Federico García Lorca

Have you guys seen the newly released Fifty shades of Grey trailer? Well if you haven’t then watch away and honestly there are so many comments if you don’t like Fifty shades, then why watch the try for it?

I watched this one with a review at the end and the woman that was reviewing it, out right said she hadn’t read the book, this is a film of a book, read and damn book or at least try and read it. People like that just rub me up the wrong way. I’ve read all three, as you would know if you read some of my previous posts and I didn’t like them very much, but I can ‘understand’ why some people do, just like with Twilight, I really do like it, but I can understand why some people do, although I couldn’t get through the first book of that series, but I managed to get to the end of the series of this one – yay and all that jazz.