By the end of the day…

Just another weekend in the life of the average University graduate… who’s hoping for the future… Continue reading

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The suns out and I’m out…

So it’s the beginning of my summer break and I feel like all my motivation to do anything really, is gone. Before I came home, I had a sort of plan for this summer, but I haven’t started doing anything – really – that I had planned.

When all you can think about is just running away from everything…

I did buy my brother’s birthday present and the stuff for my ritual. I also had a small get together last Sunday, with some of my friends, it was sort of an impromptu thing, since we’ve been trying to get together for weeks, but everyone was busy with work and revision and exams. So when on Sunday morning one of my friends said she had messed up her work schedule, so we decided it was a good idea to just meet up that evening and do some planning for Cornwall and day trip over the summer, but unfortunately we just ended up getting drunk and chatting about tit and tat, even though we did try doing some planning and then again in the morning. But it was really nice seeing them all again and all that jazz.

I also get my first vibrator this week, so that was… fun. I posted this whisper – for those of you that don’t know what whisper is, it’s an app – about it and I got 29 messages within the first minute of posting it, most of them were dirty in one way or another and then there was one that wanted to know about my buying experience, because their ‘friend’ wanted to get one.

So my buying experience, was alright a guess, I got one from Durex, because I more or less trust that company, since I didn’t want to get a crappy one, although it did set me back a pretty penny, but I think it more or less worth it. But there is so much out there, I didn’t know what to get, so I just got a simple basic one, since it’s my first one and all that jazz.

Since I bought all the supplies for my ritual on Sunday – even with the whole no banking thing, I’ve been hurt by that damn rule before – stuff has been arriving all week and one of the crystals I got came with a little booklet thing, about how to cleanse and energise and encode – I think they used a different word perhaps program – the crystal, so since I thought it would be a good idea to do all my crystals together and since one of them can’t be put in water or salt, I decided that I would use the herb method to remove negative energy, so I’ve buried 2 of my stones in sage and I’ll add the rest when they come. I don’t think I’m going to program them really, since I’m not sure right now what I want to… put into them, since I’m using them as representatives and what not.

I still haven’t found a job, but I applied to this site to be a website tester, well I applied to 2, but I can’t get one of them to work, because of a problem with my Java, so I’m going to ask the father about it, when he comes down at the weekend, to see if that can be fixed, but I applied to the other site so hopefully that will all go through fine, because they pay quite well apparently, and it looks like I’m not going to be able to get a ‘proper’ job this summer, so I’ve got some free time on my hands, apart from the ritual and the new exercise plan I’m trying to get into, because I want to get toned this summer and I’ve got 2 months – Including this one – to do it, because I’m going to Cornwall with the girls in 2 months, so I’m trying to get toned by then, I don’t think 2 months is an impossible goal, since I don’t have much else to do, apart from try and make a little money, oh and of course looking after the house, since the father is still trying to sell it, so there is going to be people round. I did want to do a whole bunch of things this summer, but the desire to save and lack of planning, leads to not much planned to do. Hopefully we’ll work that out, since we did stuff last summer and that was fun, although most of my friend have work planned – lucky ducks – although I’m not giving up on the work just yet, I’ve applied to a bunch more and hopefully will find something, since the perfect for me dog walking job went in a snap, just shows you should apply right away. But yeah I’m still looking, there’s just not really anything for someone like me.

My friend did say she would have a look to see if the place where she works will take me, but I’m not super hopeful, plus I don’t think I will be that good there or really like it, but if I can I will.

Quote/saying of the day: I always wonder why bird stay in the same place when they can fly anywhere on the earth. Then I ask myself the same question. – Harun Yahya

I’m also planning on doing some writing this summer, since I’ve only written one thing – Angels for flesh – in a long time, maybe even a year now. I’m also hoping to enter some writing competitions.

I’m not a vegetarian, but I can’t just live on meat…

So I’m back in the homestead for my Easter break, while other I know seem to be off to more exotic places, making me wish I was more of saver and had the money to travel – the world. But hey ho, it’s nice to see the cats again, although the father seems to want to get rid of them, when he moves. I would take them to university with me, but I’m pretty sure the flat I’m moving into doesn’t allow such pets, maybe goldfish, but not cats, but I’ll check when I get back.

So I haven’t really been up to much the last couple days, apart from chatting with the brother, hanging with the cats and cooking dinner for the family, although I did have to go shopping because there was literally no vegetables in the house and hardly any of anything else, apart from meat and fish.

I keep meaning to get other stuff done, like do my other brother’s birthday present, since he said he’d be done here at some point, over the next 3 weeks, so I’ve got to finish it before then and of course I’m got to finish putting together and buying the last parts for my other friends birthday present, I meant to get the last bits when I went shopping, but I completely forgot – as I usually do. And of course I’ve got to re-do my finances, because at the moment I’m not too sure how much money I have and all that jazz.

I’ve been trying to sort of some meeting up with my friends here, most of them are quite busy, but it looks like we’re going to go shopping with Thursday and we’ve set a date to try putting up the tent, we’re meant to be using for Cornwall this year, on Monday and we might go out next Thursday, but unlike me I think most of them only have 2 weeks off, while I have 3.

Quote/saying of the day: Without leaps of imagination, or dreaming, we lose the excitement of possibilities. Dreaming, after all, is a form of planning. – Gloria Steinem

Empathizing with the thieving princess and the guy on the end of the line…

So I’ve been texting this guy for a while now. It’s all pretty mundane stuff, like what we’re doing blah blah blah, but we haven’t texted in a while, so I thought, since I have some free time now, why not find out how he’s doing. But I’m not getting the idea that he’s a bit of a control freak, or at least doesn’t like moving forward with a plan, which seems to apply to every aspect of his life, including, but perhaps not limited to his ‘relationship’ with me – which is basically non existent, because we’re basically strangers. It’s all a little odd for me, especially as we’ve just had this long chat about trust, now trust really doesn’t come easy to me and he’s asking me for it. I mean trust him a complete and utter stranger, when I don’t even trust some of the people much much much more close to me, not that I don’t sometimes wish I did, but I’ve got issues and I’m dealing or something like that.

Although he’s got his own issues, which he likes to chat about sort half openly, one minute he’s all open and gushing and the next closed off and reserved. It sort of throws me off balance and send me back to the days of my – much more common – perpetual mood swings and all that jazz.

Although it seems I’m driving in at the deep end here, as I said I’d try and build up trust with him – what was I thinking. Perhaps this is another part of my life I can blag my way through, I’m pretty well versed in blagging my emotions, personality and whatever else I don’t want people to know about me – I think, although I’m only human, so human errors occur everywhere.

So I could of the gal pals came round today, so we could plan out our trip to the Isle of White, which is now no longer happened, it’s just too expensive with the ferry and all, but we’re looking into going somewhere else, such as Scotland. My friends all excited about looking for the loch ness monster, which sparked a discussion about the film water horse… And as it turns out my camping trip down to Cornwall might not happen as well – urge. I had a nice summer with stuff going on and now it’s just going down the drain. I wanted this summer to be… more, since it’s the last summer that we’ll diffidently all be together and all…

Oh shattered dreams, but it could still all pick back up, snaps the optimist in me – Forgot that I had one for a while, maybe she went on holiday.

Well at least I know I’m heading off to see the Grandparents in a week or so, which will be nice, since we don’t see them that often and – I know everyone probably says this but – my Grandmother’s cook is amazballs, or maybe just Jamaican food in general is good, or maybe somewhere in the middle, but either way I love the food I eat there and also I always feel better and more beautiful when I’m on holiday, I think it’s that whole stranger in a strange place thing and sure I do stick out a little, since I’m super pale in comparison to basically everyone we meet, unlike here, were I’m super dark in comparison, but hey ho, I love the colour of my skin so I don’t really care – one of the few things I do love about myself there.

Alright so I’ve been obsessed – which means I may have blogged about it before – this game recently- the past week or so. Monument Valley. It’s this little puzzle game – from the app store, no computer version unfortunately for me – and I really quite like puzzles games – surprisingly enough – but it’s not just that the games is fun and makes you feel like a little genius when you work out the puzzles, it’s gorgeous as well. I mean three cheers for the artists/artist of this game, because it’s absolutely gorgeous, although I wish there was more than 10 levels to play, although I think I could sit and play them over and over again, until I could do them with my eyes closed – I said I was obsessed. But I suppose it’s better to see it than take me at my word:

It also has a nice little story to explain the game. About Princesses and thieving and forgiveness, it’s all quite lovely really.

So onto something darker – sort of. I’ve got to the second book in the Fifty shade trilogy – as the back of the book calls it. Although I think part of it are slightly ruined by me knowing that there is a third books and all that jazz. And part from some glaring errors and annoying habits, prejudices and judgemental statements, I’ve sort of enjoyed reading it. I will admit right now that I think the whole books could have been better, but hey ho maybe that’s just because I’m not really into her style of writing – honest that might be because she American and I’m used to English writers, because some of the phrases she uses annoy me, but maybe they won’t an American I can’t say, it could just be me and nothing else, as well. Oh so many options. I’m nearly onto the third book now, which I am going to read and am half crossing my fingers that she drops and annoying repetition. Sure I can appreciate repetition, but she just seems to step over the line a little with her’s – step over the line the line is a dot to you (Friends quote there, thought I’d just put it in for a laugh). Although I have to say this books has given me some laughs, more than the first one, maybe, even.

Quote/saying of the day: People ask me why it’s so hard to trust people, and i ask them why is it so hard to keep a promise. – unknown

Ever since I hear them I’ve liked these guys and they have yet to disappoint – yay!