Just another few days in the life of the average University student, who’s contemplating self mutilation again… Continue reading
Just another day or two in the life of the average university student… Continue reading
Just another day in the life of the average university student… Continue reading
Now that’s something true. My Halloween has been blissfully peaceful and uneventful, but then that’s probably because I’m postponing my Halloween fun for tomorrow, due to Halloween being on a Thursday, mid week isn’t always the best time and all that jazz. But then again I have yet to have trick or treaters turnings up at my door and I’m thinking good, because I don’t have much to give them and the whole thing of ringing someone doorbell and expecting them to give you a treat for just being there in some store bought costume, really? You used to have to actually do something, like a dance or something like that, but now it’s just give us candy or else. Then I’m a little too old for trick or treating, but hey ho and world keeps turning around and around.
So I’ve had this horrible arm ache, ever since I spent a day chopping up wood. It was both tiresome and sort of fun, although the after effects aren’t fun at all. I did the chopping on Tuesday and I’m still hurting, so I’m hoping it will have stopped by tomorrow, but then it feels like my body is falling apart at the moment, as my knee was hurting this afternoon and then my back was hurting since Monday last week, so yeah… Things are achy.
Any ways on a different subject, my friend is having a decades party for her birthday this year. You can come as any decade, so I was thinking 80’s/70’s rock/punk. Since I found this jacket that I love. It’s a khaki jacket, with ‘God Save the Queen’ written across the back, which for those own don’t understand, look up the Sex Pistols and you might get it, but any who. I’ve decided that I’m going to make it myself, instead of searching the internet for one. So I’m getting a khaki jacket and then adding some metallic studs and spray painting ‘God save the Queen across the back. But other than the jacket and these new military style boots I just got, I’m not sure what else I’m going to wear. I’ve been looking through some pictures online to try and get inspiration, but at the moment I’m just thinking a bralet, tartan shorts and some leggings, but I don’t really feel like that’s good enough, although I want to get some red, John Lennon style (round) glasses, because I think their really cool and there quite cheap and all that jazz. But yeah. I’m still working on it and I’ve got some time until the party, but I want to get things that I would wear any ways, so that I’m not just spending money on something that I’m never going to wear again. Such as I did with my Halloween costume, apart from the fangs maybe the rest of the costume I wear any ways, because I don’t really have money to burn at the moment.
I’m trying to save, as I want to go to Ireland next year, although now I’m thinking that I might end up going alone. As I was thinking that it would be fun to go with friends, but the way that it’s going it might just be me, myself and I. But I think that could be a great experience as well and maybe a good bit of fun. Everyone seemed really interesting and excited about it at first, but then as it went along and talk of money came up, people seemed to less interested and so far only one seems as interesting in going as I am. So maybe we’ll go. Although neither of us can drive, so we’ll have to walk or something like that everywhere, maybe hitch hike. That would be an adventure, although it could be dangerous and I don’t know how I feel about carrying all my luggage around with me and whole trip, I’ll have to pack light – I’m not very good at that.
Recently I’ve had this over whelming need to go to the sea and not just any sea or anything. I want to go to the sea where it is clear enough to see the bottom in deeper water and go swimming, but around here there isn’t really anywhere where you can do that, so the only way I can is go abroad, but that’s not going to happen, so I’m having to suppress that need and just carry on.
Recently I’ve been contemplating reconsidering my future. It’s not that I’m having a break through in life, or that I’ve had something spectacular life changing happen to me, like someone close to me dying, or me nearly dying etc, but that’s not the point. I’m slowly edging closer to a point in my life when I’m going to have to make the decision, who am I going to be and well as much as I wish I could just be everything, do everything and go everywhere, that’s not going to happen, but I can be someone, do something and go somewhere, which is better than nothing, isn’t it?
But then I feel like I’m growing old to fast and I still want to be young, naive and utterly insane. Not care what happens and just be spontaneous. I know you can do all that and be all that when you’re older as well, but somehow I had this idea of my life being a party and then me just slotting into that job that I love and me just settling down, but then there was that other fantasy, where I never grew older than 29. But I know that’s just the fantasy – for now!
So any ways I’ve decided – sort of – what I’m going to do for my birthday this time around. Now last time it was a small house party, but I thinking this year something bigger would be better, although I was just going to have a massive party. I’m now thinking I might just go to Ireland instead, but then I still want to have a massive party and invite all those people that I won’t normally invite to a party at my place, due to one reason or another.
On a darker side, I’m breaking it off with my guy. I’ve decided I’m not really getting anything out of the relationship and I’m not really that into him, plus he’s a little bit creepy, but I stayed with him because he was sweet and nice, so I thought I’d try going for a ‘nice guy’, but he was just creepy nice. Like I could imagine him standing outside my window at night – if he knew where I lived.
So I got these new boots that I have been waiting for, for about a week or so and I just pop them on to see how they fit… and they don’t, there about a half a size too small. Now I don’t know what I am going to do, as my other shoes are either heels or have holes in them.
It’s a sad sad day. But I’m looking for some more and hopefully I will find some that are my size and do fit, perfectly, like Cinderella, but instead of getting a prince, I just get to have clean and dry feet.
Today my feet were soaked through by the time I got to the track that leads down to my place, so I just pulled them off and flung them over my shoulder, to continue the rest of the way by foot, which meant that my feet did get very muddy, but it was nice to go out barefoot again. I used to all the time, but that was back when I lived on a farm in the middle of no where, with not much chance of finding a dozen broken bottles or cigarette butts on the ground where I wanted to walk, so it was a lot more ‘clean’ in a less than bacterial sense of the word, if you get what I mean.
Any ways so I decided that next year, around Easter or during the summer, I want to go to Ireland. So I’ve been asking people if they want to come with, quite slowly and mostly one at a time, but I still haven’t really properly looked into it yet, so I want to know numbers first, just maybe’s, really, but it would be nice if everyone could come along, since I think it could be a good trip.