Thank you for the enterance…

The old man continued to stare at her sipping, his own cup of tea and prattling on about nothing important. But the look in his dark eyes told her that he knew exactly what was happening to her. For some … Continue reading

A mile stone…

Just another little something from the average university student… Continue reading

Friendly Muscle growth?

Right so, as much as this might sound like it might be a good thing, in my case it probably never will be. I’m rapidly gaining muscle tone on my arms. I mean I always had slightly muscular arms, because I did a lot of manual labour when I was younger and it didn’t turn to fat every quickly – which I’m glade about, or my legs would be flabby fat right now – but I’ve started working out, as part of my more healthy lifestyle and well it hasn’t quite turned out as I would have hoped. I mean I don’t mind a little bit of muscle, but I’ve already got man shoulders and a reputation for being hard, so I don’t think the extra muscle on my arms is at all needed and I don’t want it. I don’t want muscular arms, alright I don’t want flabby fat arms either. But I was trying out some different things today to see if there was some other work out I could do, that won’t include my arms in it and it seems as though I’m just going to have to be careful for a while. Alright it’s not a big problem or anything I know that, but it’s getting to me and I find myself flexing my arms a lot more recently to make sure that they aren’t any bigger, plus my friend made a comment about it a while ago.

So today, right well I was supposed to do some cleaning, but that didn’t really happen, I mean I did a little. I also had some disguising BBQ ribs, which I ended up giving to the cats, because they liked the taste, but I thought it taste way too much like washing up liquid – suspicious right?

So I’ve been trying to find a good time to do this thing that I’ve been meaning to do for a while now and also time to get my hair cut and styles and also time to go to the dentist, but I can never seem to find the time, I mean when I can do it they can’t and when they can I can’t, it’s a little frustrating, as I like having all my real teeth and well my hair is in need of a cut. I’ve also got to go back to the doctor to get more medication, because my allergic reaction is playing up again and I ran out of pills a long time ago. On the subject of medication, I also have to go back to the hospital soon as well. Oh the many medical things that come into my life these days, it was so much easier, when I didn’t have to spend my days looking for symptoms.

I was looking at my stats today and I’m actually pretty surprised by the amount of people who are following this blog. I mean it’s a bit weird to me, that people would be that interesting in what I have to say on here, sure if it was me I would probably follow me, but then I consider myself to be a bit of a weird person, not that I’m saying that only weird people could possibly follow me – not trying to insult anyone here. But I mean when I started this I thought I would get only a few followers at most, but now I have nearly 50, I know that to a whole lot of people thatĀ isn’t really very many, but well it is to me – not to sound sad or anything – but thanks for taking an interest guys – feel like I might have posted something like this before, but just see how grateful I am!

Alright so after that heart-felt moment there, well here’s some music.

I like Avicii, all the stuff I’ve heard has been good, so I hope it just goes up from here, unlike others – unnamed – that I liked and just got worse and worse.

So I’m happy to report that I’m almost sure that my friend isn’t going to cheat on her boyfriend. From what I can pick up on from her body language and what not, she might want to be with this other guy, but she likes her boyfriend too much. Good thing really because the boyfriend is a bit of a jealous freak sometimes. Although I might be reading her wrong, that has happen before – many a time, I’m not an expert or anything, just better than the average.

A mix of alcohol and music in the blood stream…

So yesterday I went to my friends birthday party. It was just as much of a riot as I thought I was going to be.

Although one of my friends did end up throwing up all over the bathroom and all over the walls and carpet of the stairwell. The smell of the sick drove me to end up sleeping in my friends car, instead of the room where everyone else was sleeping and at around 6 am she a couple of other people woke me back up by knocking on the window and asking to come inside, because the fire had gone out, so they were cold.

All my lovely smashed up firewood, was burn to ash, along with some crisps and chips, that came with the Chinese food. It was sort of funny, because at the start of the party everyone ordered Chinese food, but by the time it got there, nearly everyone was so pissed that they didn’t really want it any more, so the people that were not drunk, along with the people that were late, were the only ones that really ended up eating it. Although I did enjoy the chips, but it didn’t know that chips ever came with Chinese – you learn something new everyday or rather every night.

Although sadly a couple of people couldn’t come and I think we helped to add to his families belief that he is gay or that way inclined, because of some of the presents and cards that we got him, but it was in jest and his girlfriend got him a ‘wife’ card, which is now in his window.

We went back there today to pick up the left over drink to take back to my place, so that I can have it for my Halloween party in a couple of weeks.

While he was off with his girlfriend in the house me and my other friend nicked the balloons that were tied to the gate as a marker for his place, although one of them did escape on the way back to mine, the other one might still be attached to his car and flying high and proud. Although we kind of got a little crazy today after college and it seems that we just don’t need alcohol to act drunk and disorderly – high on life baby, high on life.

So day was rainy and I decided to have a lye in that didn’t work out and I ended up getting up at the usual time, which I am now regretting a little bit – I’m still a little bit sleepy. But I did get some work done, that if I hadn’t gotten up I wouldn’t have gotten done at all today, or at least I would have done such a half hearted job, that it is the same as not doing it. Although I’m trying to turn my life around a little – it’s not working – because I can feel myself falling into my usual pattern and I don’t want that to happen, because I know I could completely destroy my life if I let myself go too much.

But other than a few mishaps and a losing streak at the card game president, today wasn’t a bad day – over looking the rain and the large hole in my shoe.

So I wore a skirt today. Now this may not seem like a big deal to an outsider – which I’m guessing all of my followers are, but I haven’t worn a skirt in about a year. I mean just casually, not something form. I’ve worn dresses and shorts and what not, but not a skirt and I was feeling kind of self conscious about it, because this was quite a short and bolder skirt, but I love it, even if it does exaggerate my short figure, but what the hell. I’ve been getting back into the more punky look recently, but I also really like vintage, but not really real vintage punk though, more of the preppy or girly style in vintage. But I’ve been looking around for something good, but I also want something that works with my figure – alright slightly boring girly talk about my figure, but when you think you look good, you feel good, it’s been proven, somewhere.

But that’s not the point – I think, or maybe it is, oh well.

Onwards and downwards. So alright… Today after picking up the drink and piling it all into the pantry, I was trying to teacher my friend to play ‘With a little help from my friends’ by the Beatles on the piano. Since I learnt it in high school and is now the only song I can play all the way through on the piano any more, which is a little disheartening, since I used to be able to play quite a few, but I learn by watching and listening to other people play, as I’m not that good at reading music. I can do it but, I have to count the notes out and it takes forever… to do, so I find learning how it sounds and then recreating it is a lot easier – music just might be in the blood, as all my family are more or less musically inclined, as my brother can play at least 2 instruments each, my father can play 3 or more and my mother could play about 2 as well. Any ways so I think we successfully got through the entire song, with me trying to play it slowly, so that he could write down the notes that I was playing according to their letter, since he couldn’t really read sheet every well either, but it can be harder to get the timing right, when you don’t use the sheet music, although he said he was going to learn the song and learn the timing from that, so I think things should end up all good – fingers in the crossed position everyone.

So I would like to take a moment to thank all my followers. On my other blog, which I sadly lost – due to undisclosed reasons, it’s nothing shady I promise! – I only had the one proper follower, although I did get a bunch of page views and what not and I thought that this one was going to be similar. Don’t get me wrong some part of me like the idea that I was still writing for myself and no one was really watching, but it’s nice to know that I’m being heard and all that jazz. So thank you random strangers, you have given my blog more meaning – I would say meaning, but it already has a bit of that, gotta be honest here!

Moment over: So I’m looking for some new boots, since winter and the rain are beginning to rear their ugly head – well winter can be beautiful in it’s own right, but hey ho – but I’m having trouble find some that are cheap, what I want and are in my size and since something going to have to give, I think I’m going to have to end up buying something I don’t like. But I might continue selling my stuff, as I’ve been trying and slightly failing to do, but I need the money right now, so I’m going to continue trying. I’ve just got to finish taking pictures of everything. Although I’m considering selling my knee high boots, that I have yet to where, which is a little sad, but I’m never going to end up wearing them, then I might as well sell them and try and make a profit, since I got them in the sale and all, so I got them pretty damn cheap. I’m all for the deals, although the cheaper the stuff is the more likely I am to buy more and end up spending the same amount, when I was trying to save up.

A lonely sideways glance

So today was just another day in a slowly lengthening sequence of days that pile up to make up my life. Sort of a morbid view I know but I’m feeling morbid right now and I also know that its my own will fullness that is causing me to feel down. I could very easily change my mood, but because I’m stubborn I don’t.

It’s funny how that happens, we’re the ones that get hurt, but we still stick to our guns to dig ourselves a grave, when we could very easily put down the shovel and walk away – like the metaphor?

So I sort of found out today that tomorrow I’m off to the hospital – oh the joy – I’m having more tests and what not, after they have now pushed this back about 2 times, including changing the time over and over again – what’s with that, when they give you a time they should stick to it, unless it’s something life threatening or something like that. But yeah I’m off to the hospital in another city at that, because the one here, apparently can’t take my blood any more, although they do it every time I come in, I think my blood could fill the blood banks, if they didn’t keep wasting it on fruitless tests – maybe that’s what they’re really doing with it!

Any ways so apart from the hospital blood business and this morbid feeling, today was pretty normal. I mean I did punch my friend in the jaw and it made this really weird popping noise. Every time I do something violent these days I get this weird sort of blast from the past feeling and then this sensation of painful memories washes over me, it only last the shortest amount of time, but its there. Although I did have reason to be punching him – although he moved into the punch weirdly enough – he was teasing me about sleeping with this guy that I don’t know.

Me and my friends also got given cocaine doughnuts and one of them owns me magic mushrooms – that’s a long story, but I intend to collect…

So at the moment I’m going over some of my older writing and trying to start them over again – it’s hard. You have to get back into the heads of your characters and the sort of head space you were in when you wrote it, so it can be a challenge, but I’m getting there. There is just this one or two or ten writings that I really want to finish as I think that the ideas that I came up with need to be out there, but I’ve been writing less and less these days – excluding blogging and all that jazz – so I’m starting to feel like I’ll never get to do them. I’m not really complaining that I now feel more obligated to my social life than my writing, but it does make me a little sad a times to think of all those unfinished ideas and fragments of my soul. But I’m working on it, as I right now I need motivation and inspiration – let’s hope a change of scenery can help me get what I need.

So my ten – maybe not so – loyal follows, that’s it for today apart from to say. Thank you all for following my blog, you make me feel special and I love you all!