Diploma in hand…

So I’m officially a graduate of Bournemouth University, science and technology department. I’m suppose to be making something of my life, going out there and doing things with my degree, but that’s not happening. I might be changing jobs, again. Mainly because last week I lost 3 shifts, because there wasn’t enough people staying at the hotel. I’m thinking a more stable job might be a better idea.

I was thinking about some stuff recently, well stuff to do with BDSM and how it’s such a wide world out there, like just saying you’re into BDSM doesn’t mean you’ll like the same thing as someone else who’s into it.

After graduation I went round to an old work friends place and hung out with her and her fiancé, her brother was there for a bit as well. But I got drunk pretty quickly, because I hadn’t eaten since early that morning and emotions were running high from graduation, so I was just letting loose a little too much, but any ways I was chatting with her fiancé when she was out of the room and we ended up on the topic of BDSM. Before I had some rough sex with a guy and went into work the next day and he saw the marks – bruises all over me – I was getting my boss to check my back, because it was hurting and I didn’t realise there were so many bruises on my breasts, until they were already on display. He thought the guy had hurt me in a bad way, which I tried in my less than sober state to assure him the guy hadn’t. Her fiancé is a good guy, maybe a little overly jealous and protective, but a good guy. Any ways I was trying to explain my views on BDSM and he was saying that he had tried to get my friend into it. I think to some people BDSM, is just something kinky and sexual and exciting like that, but I think to others it’s more than some kinky sex. I like to think that some people need BDSM, whatever aspect of it gets to them, they need that in their life – perhaps I’m just being a romantic.

Any ways this conversation with my friends fiancé isn’t the only reason I’ve been thinking about BDSM again – not that I’m not always thinking about it, in the back of my mind – Mr. P, he’s into BDSM. Actually from our talks on the topic, we might be quite compatible in our tastes. Part of me wants to dive right in, but I also want to protect myself. Although everything I know about him – which is probably less than I’d like to admit – makes me want him. I keep admonishing myself for being stupid and not being more guarded, but I’m always so guarded, that sometimes it gets tiring.

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