I was going to do a post at the start of this week, entitled ‘The cruelty of a second opinion’ – about my time in Ireland – but that never happened. Since I got back to England, somethings been off with me. I’m not sure what, but I just don’t feel 100 percent right, I guess.
Maybe it’s because this week has been reading week, so I’ve had nothing like University lectures and such to do, I mean I’ve got work this weekend, or maybe it’s because it was my birthday and no matter what my birthday always makes me a bit sad, it’s like Christmas. I may be having a great time, with friends or family, but the sadness just creeps in.
Or perhaps it’s because I’m tired of University and just want it to be over already. I mean I’ve been feeling that way for awhile, but recently it’s just been… more intense or something. I’ve convinced myself that I have to see the next few month out and finish Uni, because otherwise I would have just wasted the last 2 or so years, not that I don’t think I’ve wasted them, but it would be a complete waste and I would come out of them with nothing and that least this way I come out with a degree – hopefully.
Plus if I dropped out, the father would be so disappointed in me… at least I think he would.
Any ways since I went to my nearly pointless GP appointment, I’ve decided to check out the information they gave me, on seeking profession help, for my mental issues. So I sent the place an email and am waiting for them to reply, I also sent a tattoo parlour a facebook message about getting an appointment for a consultation – I just hope they check their facebook messages – since I feel like getting a new tattoo might make me feel a bit better, or at least give me something present to forcus on, so that I stop thinking about the future so much.