I smile through the pain of living and demanded that everyone around me do the same.
I clutched my dead skin to myself, in an attempt not to change.But the dryness of it rubbed against my new flesh, making the blood boil in my veins.
I screamed into the darkness and dreamed of the ay it would answer or drag me down inside itself and bind me there forever
So as of late I’ve gotten into Sex and the City. I tried watching it before, but didn’t get past the first episode. Perhaps I just wasn’t in the mood for that sort of thing or perhaps it was because the other thing I was watching was better in some way, but for whatever reason I didn’t get into it then, but I’m into it now. I mean I watched the prequel thing, about her life as a child before I starting watching this and I’ve seen the films and now the series. I guess I’m doing things backwards or something.
Any ways I’ve been slowly getting ready for Christmas and New Years. I was chatting with some of my girlfriends about meeting up for New years eve, since I already got that weekend off of work and all that jazz. So I want to do something, but whether I actually will is yet to be seen. It would be nice to go out or something, because well as much as I love my friends, sometimes I just don’t want to be stuck with just them, especially as one of them gets a bit/very kissy when she drinks and not that she’s a bad kisser, but I’d rather she was doing it with a randomer, she will probably forget the next day than me.
I mean she’s a bit of tease in that respect I guess. She’ll make out with them, she’ll even go home with them, but she won’t sleep with them. But she has her reasons for that and it’s got nothing to do religion and everything to do with a guy from her past, at least it has something to do with that.
I feel like I’ve been talking quite a lot about my crush and I don’t want to turn into one of those girls that can’t talk about anything but the person she’s crushing on, because it consumer her world.
Any ways I still haven’t got all my Christmas shopping done, although I have been doing it, just slowly. I’ve still got to buy two to three more gifts and then I’m done. I’m not particularly good at gift buying, I don’t know if I ever was, but when your a child I feel there is way less pressure and also your parents will probably be there to help you – depending on your age and all that jazz – so the whole process is just easier and then you grow up and people expect you to just be able to pull a great gift out of your ass or something. I mean I have enough going on in my brain, to be add thinking about great gifts to the list… that’s why I’m all for the wish lists, because that way it can still be a surprise, but also no one has to worry about whether or not you’re going to like your gift, because you asked for it.
I’ve been sort of listening to this song a lot since I heard it yesterday – I think, I get the days all mixed up when I’m not working on those days. But I picked up some extra shifts this week, so I’m hoping that my old friend, who used to work there but left and has now sort of come back, will be working one of those days, so that we can chat and all that jazz.